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two years ago, i never would have thought that i would be able to say something like that. i thought that being depressed made me look cool, made me seem more real or more like an artist, but i had it all wrong. it's lame and fake. i only blame myself for whatever sadness i felt. i would get upset because i didn't go out on weekends, but i never really organized anything myself or tried to figure out what people were doing. and it was never a matter of people hating me, it was just me allowing myself to despair about the little things that are not worth getting upset over. i have been told this so many times and i always thought that it was corny and untrue, but life is totally what you make it. and i refused to be locked into a detrimental mindset that will keep me from enjoying the few bits of life that i can appreciate. things are going well and they are only going to get better. i am looking forward to many good times.
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